The perils of networking

“What do you mean, ‘Am I dressed up for my show?’ I always dress like this,” said the man with full make-up, long brown glossy wig, a 1940s style dress and heels. So my networking was going well at the Camden Fringe launch party this week.

I always find it excruciating turning up to events like this on your own. The cast were rehearsing and someone had to go along for PR. And now I had just car-crashed this man’s conversation. Fortunately, his production manager (yes, he was in a show, perhaps just not in costume) happened to turn up at that point and we happily exchanged flyers.

“The Cabaret of Pottiness. I’ve heard of that,” I said.

“Oh dear, Martini Bond looks drunk,” she said.

Martini: not a raging alcoholic

“Well she is the daughter of a raging alcoholic,” I said.

“An alcoholic has just dropped me off here. He’d been drinking since 11am.”

It was now 7pm. “I knew someone else who had spent 30 years blotto,” she added.

“Oh dear,” I said, thinking I’m meant to be promoting the show. This is going down the road of the AA, and I don’t mean Automobile Association.

“My glass is empty. I need another drink,” I said cheerily, and headed to the free bar.

My play’s listed! In print!

Earlier, I had met Alistair, one half of Chopped and Fried, who was putting on the show Much Ado About Noshing. Stories about Jews and food, said their blurb. “Oh that sort of Noshing,” said Miranda, aka Coin-Operated Girl who exposes the truth about sex workers and their clients.

They both had their own set of problems. Alistair, (I think he said he was Fried, but perhaps it was Chopped) had had to perform the two-man show as one man at his preview because Chopped had more urgent business elsewhere.

“It was OK,” he said, “we didn’t have a piano at the venue anyway. Chopped plays the piano. So I said things like: ‘This is where we play the piano’…” We all laughed and I just hoped his audience did too.

Meanwhile, Coin-Operated Girl was finding that she was attracting the wrong crowd on Twitter.

“I’m getting a lot of porno, Dirty Mac brigade followers,” she told me.

“Ah, I’ve just blogged about that,” I said. “I concluded there is no wrong crowd as long as they buy a ticket and see the show.”

“I don’t mind the porno lot,” she said. “It’s the religious ones I can’t stand. How do they know it’s a sin? They must have spent so much time looking at porn…”

On that note she headed off for a cigarette. I don’t smoke but it felt like it could be a good time to start.

Instead, I spoke to award-winning comedian Rosie Wilby. Edinburgh?, she said, you have to network. Go drinking (yes, we were back to that). Chat to the right people, get noticed, get an agent.

That all sounded exhausting so I decided to call it a night. I’d handed out four flyers. That was a success, in my book, and I’d managed to pilfer enough brochures for the cast, as well as, of course, meet some great acts.

And here’s a plug for all the acts I met:

Rosie Wilby: Olympic Swingball Champion 2012, Aug 1 Camden Head, 8pm £7 (concs £5)

Much Ado About Noshing: Aug 5, The Jewish Museum, 4pm and 8pm £10.

The Cabaret of Pottiness: Aug 5, 6, 8, The Black Heart 8pm £7.50

Coin-Operated Girl: Aug 6-8, Camden People’s Theatre, 9pm £6 (concs £5)

July 19, 2012. Tags: , , , , , , , , , . Blogging, Comedy, Comedy writing, Humour, Theatre.


  1. Carrie Rubin replied:

    Sounds like you’ve got the networking thing down. I imagine that could be the hardest part. 🙂

  2. Sharmishtha replied:

    good one 🙂

    i love your blog’s name.

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